Woman Refuses To Cover Up For Wedding So Boyfriend Goes Without Her
A woman who had initially agreed to wear a long dress and subtle make up to attend her boyfriend’s boss’ wedding then changed her mind and said there was no way she was going to “a misogynist wedding.” The man now wants to know if he was in the wrong for driving off and going without her.
Writing into Reddit the man pointed out that there was a dress code attached to the invitation requesting all women wear long dresses including covered arms and no heavy make up.
2 months ago I received an invitation to my boss’s wedding which was yesterday. My girlfriend (29) was going to be my (30 male) plus one. My girlfriend loves to dress up and wear short dresses and I love that and as long as she is comfortable I’m cool with anything.
However, my boss and his wife are very conservative. In the invitation, they asked for all men to wear black suits and the women to wear a long dress with long sleeves and no dramatic makeup. I talked about it with my girlfriend saying that it is okay if she doesn’t come but as it is my boss I must go. She told me it was fine and she doesn’t mind wearing a long dress and no heavy makeup.
So all seemed okay initially, with the girlfriend agreeing to the dress code and giving up her short dresses for one night. When the boyfriend went to pick her up however he was surprised to see she had totally gone against what they had initially chosen together.
I was so happy we both looked for dresses online and I bought them. Yesterday when I went to pick her up she was wearing the exact opposite of the dress code. She wore a short dress and dramatic makeup. Whilst she looked gorgeous ( i told her so ) I asked what happened to the other dress that she was going to wear. She said that it’s unreasonable and misogynistic for dictating what women should wear. I told her that it’s the bride’s wish and we should not disrespect it on her wedding day I asked you about this and you said you didn’t mind. And we are not leaving until she changes. She got mad and got down of the car saying she will not attend a misogynist wedding. I said fine and drove off.
Now she is not answering her phone and her friends are calling me a sexist and cruel man.
It seems upon reflection, the woman wasn’t okay with being told what she had to wear. Now the boyfriend is wondering if he was in the wrong for driving off and attending the wedding without her.
Here’s what some of the commenters on Reddit had to say:
The wedding wasn’t about her, and showing up with her out of dress code would damage your relationship with your boss and thus career. She just didn’t want to be told what to do and found and excuse, misogyny. It’s not misogyny, it’s respect. The men were also told to look a certain way.
I dont see how asking for long dresses and sleeves, and asking for men to wear suits, is misogynistic. Not allowing a woman in if they chose to to wear a pants suit/long sleeve romper, sure, misogyny. But asking they dont show a bunch of skin? That’s just a preference, and should be respected without question. I’m not a big fan of “conservative” people but tbh I could see even “liberal” people having this dress code. It’s a formal event.
Agreed. I would be super uncomfortable attending a wedding with people that conservative. I’m covered in tattoos and have purple in my hair. If my husband needed to go for work, and I felt uncomfortable enough for it to be a problem, I would decline and support him in his career.
The gf had an out, OP explained why it mattered, and she chose to throw a tantrum. Yikes. Sounds like she was actively trying to pick a fight, especially since her friends are on him.