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“My Daughter-in-Law is Demanding I Give Her My Son’s Baby Book!”

One of the great pleasures of having a new baby is compiling a baby book so you can preserve some of the special memories and important milestones. After all, they grow so fast, and they are lovely to look back through when they are older. They are always a much-loved keepsake, and often get whipped out of the cupboard by grandparents who want to compare new babies to their mum or dad at the same age.

One expectant grandmother was recently shocked when her pregnant daughter-in-law demanded that she hand over her son’s baby book. According to her son’s wife, the book belonged to the son, not to her, and since they were now married with a baby on the way, it should be handed over. In fact, she is so hell bent of getting her own way she threatened to disinvite her mother-in-law to the baby shower if she didn’t relinquish ownership of it!

My son Michael ( M, 32) and his wife Blaire ( F,33) are expecting their first baby . Blaire’s sister ask for Michael’s baby book for Blaire’s baby shower . I said I’ll bring it with myself and take It back as it’s very special to me . I put so much time to create this for myself and there are many pictures of my mother in it with Michael that it means so much to me . She said no problem and thanked me. I got a text from Blaire wondering why I would be taking the baby book back . I told her because it’s mine ?! She said no it’s not ! It’s Michael’s and now that he is married I have to hand it to her . I explained that I created it for Michael and he will have it when I die . I have so many writings , pictures and memories written in it and most Of all I look at the pictures all the time when I miss my mother . Now , Michael messaging me that Blaire’s is screaming and sobbing because I don’t let her have the baby book and how could I be heartless to a pregnant woman and she is threatening to disinvite me from her baby shower ( for the record I paid for the shower ( venue, food, decorations,..) but her sister is doing the planning ) . I don’t understand why it means so much to her ? It’s mine ! I made it !! AITAH for keeping the baby book?
ps : I am an immigrant and wasn’t born and raised here. In my culture moms make the baby books for themselves (about the baby of course )

People were shocked by the young woman’s entitled behavious and agreed that baby books belong to the mother.

Blaire is ungrateful crazy lady ! Disinviting you from the event you paid for her ? Baby book belongs to the mother ! It’s yours ! NTA (90skid12)

 

There are so many strange entitled people these days ( maybe there always were ?)

And this DIL is certainly one. The book is YOURS. For her to demand and even threaten exclusion, is completely unacceptable. Playing the pregnancy card ( “ so heartless to a pregnant woman”) , is obnoxious .Have your son read these comments! Someone above recommended calling HER mother, which could be a great idea. Or…it could backfire , because maybe Ma is just the same ! (Timid-Tlacuache)

 

NTA. The baby book goes to the child when the parent chooses to give it to them or passes. That’s the way all heirlooms work and a baby book is an heirloom. Do not let yourself be manipulated into giving it away. Maybe scan the pages and have a bound copy made. (HeartShapedsea)

Some thought that it would be best not to take it to the baby shower at all, since it might mysteriously go missing around the daughter-in-law.

Your DIL is a whacko. You realize this, yes? Hide the book and never let her get her hands on it if you want to keep it. It’s clear your son has married a massive AH. (jailthecheeto1124)

In order to avoid further issues however, some commenters thought that reaching a compromise would be the wisest thing to do in this instance.

While so many of us hail an adult-child standing up for, and having the back of, their spouse with their parents, this is absolutely a rare instance when spouse is wrong. Baby books are for the parents – not the children, in my family. I spent alot of time on my kids’ books.

 

Please recognize, however, that crazy, entitled DIL will deny OP any future access to future grandchild for OP’s refusal to handover what she thinks she is entitled to have. A compromise would be to have a hi-res scan of the book done and print those pages out in color and give her a copy.

Do not trust her with the original, bc you wont get it back. Also,put it somewhere secure in your home, bc at some future event where DIL is present, it will disappear and she will fake innocence to its whereabouts. (BonusMomSays)

 

Take photos of each page of the baby book. You can make a book with the photos from Shutterfly or any other photo site. That way your son & DIL can have the copy while you keep the original. (dncrmom)

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Jolene

Jolene

Jolene enjoys writing, sharing and connecting with other like-minded women online – it also gives her the perfect excuse to ignore Mount-Washmore until it threatens to bury her family in an avalanche of Skylander T-shirts and Frozen Pyjama pants. (No one ever knows where the matching top is!) Likes: Reading, cooking, sketching, dancing (preferably with a Sav Blanc in one hand), social media, and sitting down on a toilet seat that one of her children hasn’t dripped, splashed or sprayed on. Dislikes: Writing pretentious crap about herself in online bio’s and refereeing arguments amongst her offspring.