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This Mother of the Bride’s Catering Shortcut Might Put You Off Attending Weddings for Life

This Mother of the Bride’s Catering Shortcut Might Put You Off Attending Weddings for Life

Look, we get it. Weddings can be hugely expensive affairs, and it’s not unusual for those footing the bill to look for ways to save money here and there. But there are some things that you can scrimp on, and others…not so much. This week, a woman has taken to popular Reddit group Amithearsehole to share the ‘creative’ way her mother tried to cut costs at her sister’s recent wedding, and to say readers were aghast is an understatement!

My husband (27m) and I (26f) were married eight months ago. We had a BIG wedding with lots of food and drinks and people. I knew we would likely have leftovers, so had arranged for them to be donated to the soup kitchen we sometimes work with, however, my mom went behind my back and took most of it with her. I didn’t really know what happened to the food.

Until now.

My sister Callie (30f) got married over the long weekend. She didn’t want to mess with any of the planning and- knowing how my mom was during my wedding- decided to let our mom take over the whole thing.

All we had to do was show up where we were told and party.

The ceremony was beautiful, but it was when the buffet was revealed that I noticed something odd.

The food looked eerily familiar. Like, identical to what I had for my wedding except for a little more dried out and sad.

At this stage in the story, you’ve probably clapped your hand over your face in disbelief while you mutter something along the lines of “She didn’t?” But, yes…I’m sorry to say, she very much did!

I found an opening and went to ask my mom about it where she happily told me she “saved a fortune” by unfreezing the food from my wedding to serve to the guests now. I was horrified and immediately voiced my concerns about safety. She got upset and said I was acting like a snob and should be happy the food wasn’t going to waste. I argued that it was never going to be wasted, but she wouldn’t hear it.


I didn’t want to make a scene, but was worried about people getting sick so snuck off to see my sister. She was horribly embarrassed- mentioned that mom said something about saving money but didn’t question it because she didn’t want to foot the bill like I had. She told me not to eat the food and thanked me for the warning.

From there, my husband and I discretely started telling some guests to be weary of the food and the rest of the night was fine.

My mom caught some flack for being cheap, but I’ve also been catching heat. Some of our relatives have been saying that I intentionally made my family look bad and that the food was fine as it was frozen and then defrosted for the wedding. They say no one would have known if I didn’t make a stink over it. I don’t know if I did anything wrong, I could use some help and would like to know if I should apologize. AITA?

As you may expect, readers were quick to confirm that OP was not the arsehole in this bizarre situation, and that her mother had effectively risked poisoning the wedding guests by being such a cheapskate.

NTA. OMG!!! It’s not that it was stored frozen for eight months; it’s that it sat on a buffet table for god knows how long at your wedding, then in your mother’s car, before it was frozen. This is not only tacky but super dangerous.

Most foods frozen for eight months will at the minimum get freezer burn and lose flavor. Foods that grew a healthy bacteria load whilst being breathed on at a wedding buffet will still have that bacteria when defrosted, which means it’s still bacteria, out of hibernation and ready to do a number on your intestines. TemptingPenguin369


And we all know how buffets get treated;

“Oups, I used the same fork for the meat and the salad. Oh, well…”

“Dang, I dropped the spoon on the floor! No one saw it so I’ll just put it back”


“I’ll just pick this up with my fingers instead of fiddling with the serving spoon”

“No, little Ann, you can’t put it back after you licked it”

“I can’t find the serving knife, so I’ll just use my own, that I’ve already eaten with”

“Sammy, don’t touch all the biscuits, just pick one already”

VERY sanitary and safe… /s

NTA – Purple-Garden77


Or the absolute worst – the number of people who think hand washing is optional after going to the toilet. Any bowl of nibbles is ABSOLUTELY going to contain molecules from numerous peoples undercarriage. – PrestigiousCompany64


Seriously, this is straight up NOT OKAY, and there’s no way it could have been made okay!

Even bringing the leftovers to the food bank/soup kitchen after wedding one may have been iffy for those receiving it, depending on how long the food was left out and manhandled.


But it’s a far cry better than what mom was doing for wedding two. This was a food poisoning disaster waiting to happen. – RebeeMo

It’s hard to fathom why anyone would try to place the blame for the embarrassment the situation caused at the feet of OP and not her mother. But, as we know, the world can be a strange and mystifying place sometimes! All we know is that we’ll never look at a wedding buffet in quite the same way ever again!

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Jolene enjoys writing, sharing and connecting with other like-minded women online – it also gives her the perfect excuse to ignore Mount-Washmore until it threatens to bury her family in an avalanche of Skylander T-shirts and Frozen Pyjama pants. (No one ever knows where the matching top is!) Likes: Reading, cooking, sketching, dancing (preferably with a Sav Blanc in one hand), social media, and sitting down on a toilet seat that one of her children hasn’t dripped, splashed or sprayed on. Dislikes: Writing pretentious crap about herself in online bio’s and refereeing arguments amongst her offspring.

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