Woman Wants To Know Why It’s Always The Mother Who Takes Time Off Work For A Sick Child
A woman has taken to the internet to ask why she should be expected to take time off work instead of her husband to look after their sick child. In fact she’s asking social media users if she’s in the wrong for forcing her husband to call in sick instead of her. What do you think?
Here’s what she wrote into discussion forum Reddit:
AITA for making my husband take the day off unpaid to stay home with our kid?
Kiddo came home with pinkeye last night. Husband didn’t notice when he picked her up, but by the time I got home it was obvious.
I immediately went and got her the required drops to clear it up. Per our health unit rules; she has to have been on drops for 24 hours AND have no eye goop before returning to school. So someone has to stay home today. At best she returns tomorrow. We asked everyone. 6 different family/friends. No one is available.
So one of us has to stay home. Here are the facts:
I work in healthcare, I have a full schedule of patients today. I am only in this clinic once a week so rescheduling my day is challenging. There is no one to cover. these patients would have to wait at least another week to see me.
He works in a warehouse and delivers building material for contractors, builders, and homeowners. There are deliveries scheduled, but he didn’t say anything was urgent. I have sick days and personal days remaining. He does not get sick days, but could move a vacation day.
I am salaried, and the breadwinner. He works hourly and will lose a day’s pay, BUT he is working an extra day this week so it will balance out. He WILL, however, lose the extra day and the overtime. I have already said that I will stay home tomorrow if needed, even though it would mean rescheduling a bunch more patients (but it’s a Clinic I’m in four days a week so rescheduling it’s a lot easier.)
AITA (am I the a**hole) for making him take the day off unpaid?
He assumed I would volunteer to take the day off and is a bit pissed about having to take the day off. There is also an underlying element of the mother being the default parent here that I’m constantly up against. He is mad about missing out on overtime. I have already committed to taking tomorrow off. And I have already taken two other days off when kiddo was sick. He has not.
Commenters definitely had their opinions and weren’t afraid to share their point of view.
“NTA (not the a**hole) He is a parent first and has less urgent work to be done. He should stay home for the day.”
“Sharing the days staying home is incredibly normal. And while already being the breadwinner, she somehow is also alone responsible for taking off every time the child is sick and getting them treatment in the first place.”
“What is the game plan here? Mum not getting actual days of or vacation days because she uses them caring for the child and husband would lose out on money?”
“Husband never taking of days because money or husband taking days of when feeling like it?”
“What does he say about the situation? You are a couple, you don’t make him do it, you decide together. NTA, because your point of view seems logical to me, but it strikes me that you seem to be collecting reasons for him to do what you want.”
“In other words, once again, the woman is automatically assumed to be the one to do all of the childcare.”
”Seriously, calling half a dozen other people before asking the PARENT to stay home with the child. That says alot. There are 2 parents, it is not unreasonable to expect the other one to take a day off to watch a sick child.”
“Nta and it’s misogynistic to think men can’t take time off to help with the kids too. You work with immunocompromised people, can’t risk them having it! Tell him to enjoy his damn day.”
Do you think it was unreasonable for the husband to be asked to stay home?