Ladies: A Call to Arms! (Or Feet Rather.)

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Dear Women of the World,
We are fighting an invisible evil β an evil that creeps into our lives and laundry baskets on a daily basis. It is an evil that feeds not upon our souls, but upon the very fibres of our freshly laundered socksβ¦and only ever one from any pairβ¦and never the one with the hole in the toeβ¦always the good one!
We call him the SOCK MONSTER⦠(although I have a sneaking suspicion that he is also partial to chewing bra hooks out of shape and dislodging underwires, but I am yet to find any hard evidence to support this.)
So what are we to do? How can we overcome this monumental pain in the derriereβs of laundry-doers the world over? How do we secure a world for our children in which they no longer have to hop to school on one foot?
I HAVE A DREAM!
I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the laundry pile.
I have a dream that one day this nationβs women will rise up as one to overcome their missing sock issues.
I have a dream that one day my three little children will be able to go to their sock drawers and find lots of neatly bundled paired up socks.
I have a dream today.
So what dβyou say ladies?
I propose a National Sock-Pairing Day! Letβs all come together with our washing basket of odd socks. Letβs share and support one another to find those socks a new mate. Letβs show that sock monster that he will not break us!