The Other Half: The Crap Gift Givers Edition
Whilst I was away in Queensland with the children Hubbster took it upon himself to buy me a gift! (Hooray, and it wasn’t even my birthday!) I was excited!
…That is until it turned out to be is a lamp for my computer desk in the middle of our living room.
“Oh wow, honey,” I said thanking him (trying not to look nonplussed.)
“Yeah,” he said looking proud of himself. “It’s so you don’t have to have the big light on when you are working, and I’m watching the footy.”
So the question is…have you ever bought a gift for yourself, disguised as a gift for someone else?
I have..one year, I bought Hubbster an old wine barrel that had been converted into a rocking chair…and it took him almost three years to convince me to let him take it away from the indoor fire and let him put it in his man cave….and that may only have been because we had kids and I didn’t want it covered in weetbix and texta ink!
Fast Lane Dad
I once bought my wife a car which, I really bought for myself.
It started a few years before when I was doing a little motor racing and fell in love with my race car, a Honda Crx.
She was a sporty little number that I had to sell to fund a faster and more expensive model, as you do but I swore that one day I would again own a Honda Crx.. That day arrived and after some body repairs and mechanical tinkering my little beauty was ready for my wife to pootle to work and back in and I could thrash round in on evenings and weekends.
She crashed it, we divorced, I got the car.. Result! What happened to the car in the end is a story for another time..
David ‘Bucky’ Goldstein – Aussie Daddy Bloggers
My dad and I have a lot in common. We share a name, we share a love for the same football team, and we live so damn close we nearly share an address. We also share a love for scotch. Dad likes most types of scotches as do I. Dad though isn’t a huge drinker…and I never seem to have enough scotch in the cupboard (you know where this is leading don’t you?)…”Happy Birthday Dad, here’s a single malt”…”Happy Father’s Dad, here’s a Johnny Black”…”Merry Christmas Dad, you do like Dimple don’t you?”. When our cupboard is bare…dad’s isn’t.
I have to admit, I commonly chuck in a box of chocolates or a bottle of Bailey’s when I buy Quigs a gift. Quigs has cut right down on sugar and doesn’t eat chocolate…what a shame, I’ll just have to look after those chocolates myself…whilst sitting back on the couch drinking Bailey’s on ice.
I think I have a drinking problem…
Reservoir Dad
‘Hey,’ I say to Reservoir Mum. ‘I haven’t ever bought a present for you that I was really, secretly, buying for myself have I?’
‘Ahh, yes!’ she says. ‘That hands-free phone adapter that I used once and that you’ve had in the family car for the past year. That Bruno Mars CD you bought me that I only had for a month…’
‘Oh that’s in the gym,’ I say.
‘The light kettlebells you bought me to workout with that you then leant to one of your mates.’
‘Um… I can get that back…’
‘… the purple g-string that I wore once for you and that’s now – suddenly – way to big for me because you put it on to spice things up one night and…
‘Okay no then,’ I say. ‘I’ll just tell Mum’s Lounge that you said no.’
Travis ‘Chubba’ Bull – Tacklenappy
I wish I had of bought my wife a bowling ball with my initials in it but unfortunately I don’t bowl anymore. So I had to think back through all the gifts I have given, there was the Kitchen Aid (nup), the ipod (maybe) and the weekend away (very close) and I thought these were not cutting it for this question then I came up with one of my most recent gifts.
A onesie, I knew that my wife hated them (although that has changed after wearing one). The onesie was a selfish purchase by me, there is something alluring about a lady in press studs and baby clothes. It turns out that this was a very wrong hypothesis, they are too comfortable and press studs do not allow easy access, onesies actually mean more relaxation and more sleep, more cuddling rather than anything else.
I can’t believe that it actually backfired on me, oh well my next gift, sorry my wife’s next gift will be a new footy or golf sticks etc.