Embarrassed Woman Asks Others to Share Their Funniest Fart Stories and We Can’t Stop Giggling!
Sometimes, there is nothing more embarrassing than an untimely fart. But then again, there really is nothing funnier than a fart story, and here we are.
A mum has opened up about an embarrassing moment while visiting her chiropractor, asking other women to please share their own funny fart moments to make her feel a bit better.
Well, she asked for funny farty stories and it was funny farty stories that she received! We have collected the very best of her responses for you, so please enjoy:
? I once had the last appointment at a ladies clinic, right as it overlapped to the man’s clinic. So I was the last smear appointment of the day at 7pm… I had to collect a script from the office that didn’t reopen until 7.15 so I sat down in a waiting room full of men, did not think anything of it. All of a sudden as I shifted in my seat I let rip a cracking fanny fart that vibrated on the plastic chair and through the metal legs into the lino. To this day I blame the speculum that stretched me open. Everybody in the room stared at me, I was gutted and hid behind a leaflet. A leaflet for STD’s. ~ HellsBellsAndBatteredBananas
? I sharted during sex with an ex. He turned out to be a dick so I’m kind of glad ~ NoArmaniNoPunani
? While being very pregnant with DD I had terrible wind problems. Having a rest one afternoon I popped on some headphones and sat listening to some music, eyes closed and farting like there’s no tomorrow. Really long loud satisfying ones. Opened my eyes and there is BIL and new girlfriend who had been sat there for ages and had full force of my farty botty thrust upon them ~ Sweetpea55
? Went into the ladies loo at work and the first cubicle was occupied, so I did the decent thing and went into the last cubicle. The (unknown) woman in the first cubicle let out the most enormous thunderous fart and I am ashamed I burst out laughing. Proper belly laugh. I quickly washed my hands and left, leaving the phantom farter in the cubicle. Never discovered who it was ….. ~ KC225
? DH and I lounging around a pool in France. It was very quiet, just a few people quietly reading books. DH all wet from the pool came and laid on the plastic sun lounger and farted. Only a tiny one (for him anyway) but against the wet seat it was incredibly loud and worse, echoed. It was one with a bit of a question mark noise at the end. And nobody reacted or moved. Not one. Silence. They were all terribly mature.
Not me, I was laughing so much we had to leave ~ GreenOliveOrBlackOlive
? Worst one was when I was talking to our child’s Head Teacher after two weeks on Atkins. I let out the worst smelling fart anyone has ever released in the history of womankind. It actually cleared the school hall. Luckily I was holding baby DS and apologised saying I had better change his nappy ~ cuppycakey
? I was in bed one morning and had a massive sneezing fit. But every time I sneezed I let out a short but violent fart that shot straight up and gave me extreme fanny ripples. Being a grown up I got the giggles, crying snotty, sneezy, farty giggles. That made me need to pee, so I had to do that knee and thigh closed shuffle to the loo, all whilst still sneezing, farting and giggling. My daughter was not impressed, which only made it funnier. Apparently it’s called a snart. ~ MonoClue
? I did a huge fart in the face of the poor midwife stitching me up after giving birth to my son. I could feel it coming and had no power to stop it! I did stop taking gas and air long enough to shout ‘I’m so sorry, but I’m going to fart’ before it happened. Mortifying, and my partner still thinks it’s hilarious! ~ carringtonm
? At work we have a toilet directly off the main office. Thin walls too. When I went for a wee last week (really struggling with early pregnancy bloat and wind) the loudest, most musical fart came out of my arse, entirely taking me by surprise. I knew that everyone would have heard it which made me laugh, but when I came out they were all in absolute stitches, apparently the fart was funny, but what tickled them was that they could then all hear me giggling to myself about my parpy bum. ~ EllebellyBeeblebrox
? I had just got out of a nice warm relaxing bath and was in the nip. DH was in the room and I said that I felt a little sore patch on my buttock. He said, “bend over and I’ll have a look”. So, there I am bent over and he is right behind my bum. He says, ” you’re okay, nothing there”.
It is at this point that he decides to gently stroke down my butt cheek with his finger for a giggle. Bad idea. He must have stimulated a nerve or something and I just let fly with an unstoppable column of fart. His face was a picture. I got a “fuck me love, I felt me eyeballs wobble” before he dissolved into a fit of laughter. ~ MerryBerryCheesecake
? DH has been the unfortunate receiver of an unanticipated sharp parp to the face when he was, er, doing the business orally. He was polite enough to finish the job but commented that he “came back up with a centre parting”. ~ Elephantina
Source: Giphy and Mumsnet