Grandparents Refuse to See Grandkids Unless They ‘Put in Effort to Dress Up and Look Nice’
The gap between expectations and actual reality is what causes a lot of people to be unhappy with what they have. And this is especially true when you place those expectations on other people, especially children. Kids couldn’t give a flying fig what anyone expects them to say or do, they’ll usually be their true selves no matter what.
These expectations are what has caused a huge rift in an already broken family after a grandmother told her daughter off for not making her children put in an effort to dress up when they came to visit them. You know, like it was a Royal Visit or something.
One might think that the grandmother was an old-fashioned senior lady of advancing age, brought up in another era where children were seen and not heard. No. This nanna is all of 52.
Penning her story to Reddit’s Am I The Asshole sub, the mum in question wanted to know if she were in the wrong for telling her mother that she was being ridiculous for expecting her grandchildren to dress up to see them.
Hmmm. Yes, we can see why the relationship between the mother and grandmother is strained. Imagine being so controlling as to insist on what clothing your grandchildren wear when you rarely see them? Is that really the most important part of the visit? Judging her grandchildren’s clothing? How about getting to know these kids who she’s clearly not spent a lot of time with? Priorities, woman!
“I want to see your children, but not to actually KNOW them. Dress them up like good props and be sure they don’t talk either.” wrote one Redditor.
“Your children should dress up to show respect for me, the grandmother they do not love, and hardly know (due to my own prior bad conduct)”. —your mum, the a-hole,” added another.
Others pointed out that this grandmother only cares about the optics of having grandchildren.
“It really demonstrates the relationship they want with their grandkids. “I don’t want you as you are, I want you curated and perfect in order to be valid in my eyes.” They don’t care about your family, they care about how your family makes them look.”
While there are places and events that call for a smart casual dress code, weekend visits with family who supposedly love you just as you are should not be one of them.