Millennials Share the Most Middle-Aged Thing They Caught Themselves Saying Recently and Yes, It’s Really Happening
Before too long we all settle into middle-age and begin to talk like our parents. If it hasn’t happened to you yet, rest assured that it will at some point! You’ll be minding your own business, thinking youthful thoughts when suddenly your mother’s voice comes out of your mouth and you hear yourself complaining about them changing the layout of the supermarket again.
And when it does, an existential crisis will settle upon you and life will never be the same again. “Am I getting old?” you’ll mutter, as you struggle to get out of a soft, comfy lounge.
Millennials, also known as Generation Y or Gen Y, were born between 1981 and 1996, meaning that the oldest of them are turning 40 this year. This shift into middle-age has not gone unnoticed by many and they were asked “What was the most middle-aged thing you caught yourself saying recently?” on Reddit recently. Their answers are just about as relatable as you can get.
? I saw a few teenagers out in short skirts and light tops and I turned to my partner and said “Jaysus are they not freezing with not a coat between them”
? Do you want to go out for dinner? Oh no, I can’t; I have chicken in the fridge that I have to cook before it goes bad
? “Oh no thank, you. I can’t have caffeine this late in the day or I’ll never get to sleep tonight.” My spouse was offering me the last soda from the fridge. It was 1 pm.
? Why do I get up every day and crack like a glow stick without the glow it’s so disappointing.
?I was venting to a coworker about these noisy bastards living next to me. I actually said the words, “goddamn teenagers and their Bluetooth machines”. I stand by my admonition but man it was my greatest age leap forward since I embraced the sensible Toyota.
⚫ I slapped a crate I had strapped onto the back of my car and said “This isn’t going anywhere”
? “We really need the rain”
⚪ Not something I said but I just stood out on my porch this morning drinking my coffee and someone drove by pretty fast and I thought “that’s way too fast”
? That’s a nice box, keep it.
? Scrolling through my Spotify and constantly asking who the hell are these people?
? I saw a mannequin in Target wearing a very short jumper dress and said, out loud, “this is so short! Who can wear this comfortably? It wouldn’t even pass the finger-tip test!” My husband laughed at me and just steered me away so we could pay for the new bin I wanted for my compost. I have become That Lady and I am ashamed.
⚫ “No, I’m okay. It just takes my back a little while to loosen up in the morning.”
⚪ Calling a 21-year-old guy a “kid”.
? Why is the music so loud in here?!
? I was giving my sister-in-law a bag of skirts that I am too old to wear now and I reminded her to wear them with some nice and cosy stockings, as the weather is still bad, those skirts are very short and we certainly do not want her to catch a cold.
? I’d like to see Billy Joel live.
Do you have any of your own to add?