Mum Slammed for Treating Her Two Daughters’ Pregnancies Differently Claiming She Has a ‘Good Reason’
It shouldn’t make any difference what circumstances lead to a new grandchild being born, but one granny is defending her actions in treating her two daughter’s pregnancies differently, stating she had good reason to treat one better than the other.
The woman claims that her eldest daughter had a child while still studying at college and not in a relationship with her baby’s father and that her second daughter was married and the baby was planned, therefore she had every right to treat them differently.
Taking to Reddit to seek validation for her actions, the grandmother explained her reasons for celebrating one daughter’s pregnancy and not the other.
“When my oldest told me she was pregnant, she was still in college, unemployed and the baby’s father was refusing to be involved. I was not thrilled but I provided all the help I could and took care of her. I was having a health crisis at the time so I was very stressed out. I love my grandchild but the birth didn’t exactly happen in the happiest of circumstances.
My oldest daughter ended up back in a relationship with the baby’s father and they are happy and stable now.
My younger daughter announced her pregnancy a few months ago and the situation cannot be more different. She’s married to her husband who she’s been with for several years, they’re both financially stable and the baby is clearly planned.
I have had zero stress dealing with my daughter’s pregnancy this time and I’ve been generally happier about it. I was unknowingly proving I was more excited this time around which I have since corrected. I also planned a baby shower for my youngest which I didn’t do for my oldest.
My oldest is furious. I can imagine why but I feel she should understand how different the circumstances were.
She’s said some really hurtful things to me and has prevented me from seeing my grandchild, even on the phone. I have already apologised a few times but it hasn’t made a difference.
My youngest is now having some pregnancy-related health issues and we’re feeling very scared. I got a text from my oldest yesterday that if it were her having a health scare during her pregnancy, I would’ve probably celebrated. I broke down crying because I was so hurt.
Am I wrong here?”
Uhhh, yeah. Yeah, you are wrong.
It sounds like this woman judged her eldest daughter harshly for her circumstances and treated her accordingly, blaming her actions on being stressed out at the time. And although she corrected herself after realising the contrast in her excitement, this doesn’t erase the hurt that her eldest daughter is obviously feeling after seeing her mother plan a baby shower for her sister that she never received during her own pregnancy. Any feelings of neglect during her pregnancy are now being confirmed and thrown in her face!
“Not planning a baby shower and then doing so for your youngest is terrible. And that is probably just one of many ways that your different feelings for the two pregnancies showed,” wrote one Redditor.
“Obviously stress is stress, but the fact that you were ‘less supportive’ of the daughter that actually needed your support the most makes me feel disturbed, to be honest,” added another. “It appears you let your prejudice of having a child unplanned outside of marriage blind you. And you’re throwing a baby shower this second time is indicating that you approve and are happy with this second grandchild.”
Others took a different point of view, saying that a different response to a different set of circumstances is only natural.
What do you think? Let us know in the comments!