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“My Wife is Demanding a New Car in Exchange for Having a Child!”

 Whilst the idea of a ‘push present’ isn’t new, they are generally given to a new mum after the birth of a child to mark the occasion and as a acknowledgment of the toll pregnancy and childbirth can take. But have you ever heard of anyone making demands on what they want to be given in exchange for having a baby? One man has turned to Reddit for advice after his wife told him she expects to be gifted a new car if she gives him a child. Not just that though, she also wants him to get her name and the child’s name tattooed on him.

My wife and I have been together for eight years and married for one. She is very career-driven, which I support and am proud of. Recently, we’ve started discussing starting a family, partly because her mother mentioned her biological clock.

During these discussions, my wife said she wants a brand-new car as a gift for carrying and delivering our child and asked me to tattoo my abdomen with her and the child’s names. She wants the car in her name and a colour of her choice. She argues that pregnancy and childbirth are painful and potentially gruesome experiences that will change her body, and she believes a car and the tattoo would be fitting rewards and reminders.

I told her that I’d never heard of a husband buying such an expensive gift in exchange for having a child and suggested this felt like a financial transaction. While we’re financially comfortable, we’re not wealthy, and I can’t afford to spend over $30,000 on a car when that money could be used as a down payment on a property we both share.

She became upset and tried to convince me that buying the car is a fair deal. Later, I suggested adopting a child if she didn’t want to go through the pregnancy. This situation has made me question my desire to start a family together. If she’s asking for this now, what else might she demand in the future?

AITAH for not agreeing to buy her a new car and tattooing myself? This feels like a financial transaction.

Has anyone experienced this before? If so, how did you handle the situation?

Reddit users thought that he was right to be wary of starting a family with his wife considering her demands.

 nta. i would not get a pet with someone so immature, run as fast and far as possible and don’t look back (mercy_fulfate)


Yikes on bikes..just the level of entitlement your wife exhibits. You are definitely NTA and you are very correct in your hesitation in procreating with her at this point. I’ve heard of some basic little trinkets or acts of service between husband and wife either just before or after having a baby, just more or less for him to acknowledge the huge ordeal carrying and birthing a child is. I personally didn’t expect that from my husband, nor has literally anyone I know. But I have heard of it. The difference is in the cases I’ve heard of, it was the husband who decided to do the thing for his wife on his own accord, which is super sweet, loving and considerate, imo. But the wife demanding it, and not only that, having a specific, pre-meditated, over the top plan for the transaction? Get outta here!! That’s ridiculous and very, VERY telling of the kind of person she is and where her priorities lie. 🚩🚩imo.. (ObjectiveLength7230)

Sounds pretty sketchy, she wants to brand you and get a car solely in her name for having kids?

Sounds way too materialistic and immature.

NTA (EngineerLostonPertam)

Other people questioned whether she actually wanted children.

I don’t think she wants children. She’s giving super high expectations with the idea that you’ll reject them. By rejecting them, it’ll be your fault that you don’t have kids, not her’s. She needs to come clean. (ExtinctFauna)

Some commenters thought that perhaps her skewed perspective had come from seeing lavish push presents on social media.

She’s been watching too much TikTok content about push presents. I’m in the financial position to get my wife a push present, and I did for our child’s birth. I got her a nice Cartier watch, not a car lol, and we already own a house and income properties so it was a gift that has no bearing on our financial future, merely a fun little splurge.

NTA (RogerPenroseSmiles)


A push present should absolutely be his idea, not necessarily her demand. (Truth_Tornado)

Others questioned whether she was in the relationship for love or money.

Currently pregnant with our very wanted first. The baby itself will be my push present lol. No shade to folks who want to give/receive a gift for carrying/birthing a child. But also, you don’t want the gift to be the whole/primary motivation, right? (Critical-Entry-7825)

NTA, sorry buddy but she’s just gold digging here. Married people have children, they don’t use their uterus to bargain for some flashy overpriced car, and they certainly don’t demand someone tattoo themselves.
I think your wife has finally let her mask drop and shown you who she really is, and boy is it not pretty. Plan your escape because in a few years you will look back on this moment and kick yourself for not seeing it sooner. (Status_Wed_8917)

What do you think? Did you receive a push present?

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Jolene enjoys writing, sharing and connecting with other like-minded women online – it also gives her the perfect excuse to ignore Mount-Washmore until it threatens to bury her family in an avalanche of Skylander T-shirts and Frozen Pyjama pants. (No one ever knows where the matching top is!) Likes: Reading, cooking, sketching, dancing (preferably with a Sav Blanc in one hand), social media, and sitting down on a toilet seat that one of her children hasn’t dripped, splashed or sprayed on. Dislikes: Writing pretentious crap about herself in online bio’s and refereeing arguments amongst her offspring.

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