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An Open Letter From a Mother to Anna Duggar Has Gone Viral – Raise Daughters To Breathe Fire!

It seems that every day we have some new piece of information or celebrity linked to the Ashley Madison leak scandal. You know Ashley Madison? The website for married couples looking to have discreet affairs. The one with the tagline LIFE’S SHORT, HAVE AN AFFAIR.


Josh Duggar, from reality tv show 5000 kids and counting, has been one of those caught out in the whole saga. But for Josh this is just another major F up in his illustrious career as chauvinist pig, child abuser and now two timing snake.

A lot has been said about Josh through all of this but not much has been mentioned about his child bride Anna. That is until now.

On August 20th, a mother took to face book and wrote an open letter expressing her disgust and anger in how poor Anna has no choice in her life. How Anna was raised to be a subservient wife, to do everything she was told and not question things. So Anna did all that, and now she’s here. Married to a man that in no way upheld his side of the bargain. Author and mum, Jessica Kirkland, goes on to address the tough obstacles Anna will face as she was raised to be dependant on her husband. She begs parents to empower their daughter’s and give them the tools to survive without a man.
She is pleading with parents to raise strong, independent daughters, in the wake of the Josh Duggar, 28, scandals.

Here’s Jessica’s open letter that she posted to Facebook:

“I know everybody is laughing about this Josh Duggar story. Oh, a DUGGAR on Ashley Madison, it’s so rich! I wish more people would talk about Anna. I normally keep things light on Facebook, but let’s talk about Anna. Let me tell you: Anna Duggar is in the worst position she could possibly be in right now. Anna Duggar was crippled by her parents by receiving no education, having no work experience (or life experience, for that matter) and then was shackled to this loser because his family was famous in their religious circle. Anna Duggar was taught that her sole purpose in life, the most meaningful thing she could do, was to be chaste and proper, a devout wife, and a mother. Anna Duggar did that! Anna Duggar followed the rules that were imposed on her from the get-go and this is what she got in reward- a husband who she found out, in the span of 6 months, not only molested his own sisters, but was unfaithful to her in the most humiliating way possible. While she was fulfilling her “duty” of providing him with four children and raising them. She lived up to the standard that men set for her of being chaste and Godly and in return, the man who demanded this of her sought women who were the opposite. “Be this,” they told her. She was. It wasn’t enough.

What is Anna Duggar supposed to do? She can’t divorce because the religious environment she was brought up would blame her and ostracize her for it. Even if she would risk that, she has no education and no work experience to fall back on, so how does she support her kids? From where could she summon the ability to turn her back on everything she ever held to be sacred and safe? Her beliefs, the very thing she would turn to for comfort in this kind of crisis, are the VERY REASON she is in this predicament in the first place. How can she reconcile this? Her parents have utterly, utterly failed her. Think of this: somewhere, Anna Duggar is sitting in prayer, praying not for the strength to get out and stand on her own, but for the strength to stand by this man she is unfortunately married to. To lower herself so that he may rise up on her back.

As a mother of daughters, this makes me ill. Parents, WE MUST DO BETTER BY OUR DAUGHTERS. Boys, men, are born with power. Girls have to command it for themselves. They aren’t given it. They assume it and take it. But you have to teach them to do it, that they can do it. We HAVE to teach our daughters that they are not beholden to men like this. That they don’t have to marry a man their father deems “acceptable” and then stay married to that man long, long after he proved himself UNACCEPTABLE. Educate them. Empower them. Give them the tools they need to survive, on their own if they must. Josh Duggar should be cowering in fear of Anna Duggar right now. Cowering. He isn’t, but he should be. He should be quaking in fear that the house might fall down around them if he’s in the same room as she. Please, instill your daughters with the resolve to make a man cower if he must. To say “I don’t deserve this, and my children don’t deserve this.” I wish someone had ever, just once, told Anna she was capable of this. That she knew she is. As for my girls, I’ll raise them to think they breathe fire.”


The hashtag #BreatheFire, has now gained traction all over the internet. People are showing their commitment to raise strong, independent daughters.

What do you think? Does Anna have a choice in her marriage? Can she just up and leave? Should we be empowering our daughters?

I say yes! I also say let’s not forget to educate and teach our boys how to behave the right way too. How to treat everyone around them, wives, mothers and sisters with respect and consideration. Let’s raise boys that know how to treat their women. How to treat their men. How to be a man. Perhaps then we won’t need to work as hard in teaching our girls that they can breathe fire.


Images courtesy of Google Images


Chrystal Lovevintage

Chrystal Lovevintage

Chrystal is a writer and blogger who loves nothing more than watching back to back episodes of crime shows. Should she ever find herself needing to cover up a crime, she'll know exactly what to do! Her dream is to one day live in Palm Springs where she can do her writing poolside while drinking endless gin and tonics. Mum to the cutest twin boys in the world, she loves nothing more than the sound of their laughter (usually heard when they're conspiring against her). Entertainment writer and pop culture junkie, she will be bringing you all the celebrity gossip and news that your brain can handle. You can follow her blog at and on Instagram at Chrystalovevintage

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