The Five Steps to Bed That Jimmy Giggle Won’t Tell You About!
We’ve all been there at one stage or another, right? You still love your partner with all your heart, but it’s been a busy day with the kids, you’re tired, you’ve got a million things to do…and to be totally honest a good night’s sleep sounds more appealing than a roll beneath the sheets.
In truth, female libido (unlike that of men!) can be affected by many factors, both phsychological and physical. For example, some medications, or fluctuations and changes in hormones during pregnancy or after child birth, combined with lack of sleep, or anxiety or depression can very easily take its toll on a women’s desire for sex.
It is all too easy to view ourselves primarily as ‘the mother,’ after childbirth, rather than seeing ourselves as the sexual beings we once were…and will be again!
So…here are my five suggestions (from one mum to another) for reclaiming your sexuality, and putting the Jimmy back into your Giggle! (Whatever that means!)
And this is a biggy…explain to your partner that pressure is not sexy! Snide comments on how hard-done by he is on the sex-front is not likely to get you in the mood. On the contrary, it is more likely to have the opposite effect.
Have Some Time Away From the Children! Creating a child-free space that you can enjoy with your partner, whether it is for a weekend away, an evening meal together, or just a few hours alone, can help you to reconnect and see one another as partners, not just parents! Many mums feel guilty or think it is selfish to want this time without the children. I say nourishing your relationship with your partner is as good for and healthy for the children as it is for you! Marriages and relationships take work too, and devoting a little bit of time to keeping a family home happy and whole is not something to feel guilty about!
Dance! Dancing by yourself can ease stress, and put you back into touch with the movement and magic of your body. Dancing with your partner, for example to your song, can stir both memories and groins…and could be just the foreplay you need to get you in the mood!
Kegels. We all know we should do them to keep our pelvic floor healthy and intact, particularly after giving birth, but doing your Kegel’s can also have sexual benefits. Kegel’s increase the blood flow to your genitals making you more aware of sensations there and also increases the strength of orgasms. (You’re doing them now aren’t you?) In fact, some women get aroused just doing the exercises (it’s true…just saying!) and lets not forget the added pleasure a noice toned vagina produces for your partner.
Watch a romantic movie or erotic movie. Read a romantic or erotic book. Apparently women who read those trashy ‘romance books’ that many of us scorn, have more sex. For women, sex is often as much about the mind as it is about the body, so put it back onto your mind’s radar. There’s nothing like a good fantasy to get you back in the mood! Hoot! Hoot!
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