The Outback Witch & My Dreams of Being a Children’s Author
It is with much trepidation and fluttery butterflies in my stomach that I share today’s post with you.
What I am about to show with you *gulp* is one of three (in a series) of stories that I wrote a few years ago, when Foghorn was a tiny baby and the Woo was a wee toddler, and long before we had any inclination that there would also be a Bubble in our not so distant future.
I am nervous to share it, but also kind of grateful that I have so many loyal readers who I hope I can rely on for some honest feedback…both positive and negative.
I literally have my heart in my mouth as I hit the publish button.
It is one of the pieces of writing I am most proud of, but also most hesitant to share…possibly because I have always imagined it, since it popped out of my head and onto the paper one morning in bed, as a children’s picture book.
Alas though, my efforts to find a publisher for it ran aground, and without an agent (and absolutely no idea how else to approach it) I ran out of steam.
So…instead of letting it sit, idly forevermore in the memory of my computer, I have decided to share it…and with it another vestige of my brain! (If that is what you can still call it after three glasses of wine!)
I do ask one thing though…if you do manage to get passed this long winded and boring introduction and actually read the story, please leave me a comment…a truthful comment to let me know what you thought.
I’m a big girl…I can take it…honestly, and I am all in favour of constructive criticism.
Sheila was a forgetful witch.
In her tumble-down old shack,
She lived with her familiars
In the Australian Outback.
One morning over breakfast
Sipping bush tea with Big-Red,
She felt something important
Was missing from her head.
‘There’s something I’ve forgotten,
And I tell you, I’ll be glad
When I remember what it is.
It’s driving me quite mad!’
Frog pointed a webbed finger
At the calendar on the wall.
‘The thirty first of October
Is The Annual Witch’s Ball.’
The witch let out a wail
Almost choking on her toast.
That’s right! Now she remembered.
It was her turn to host!
The witch was panic-stricken
‘Now what will I do?’
‘We’ll all muck in and help you,’
Said her trusty kangaroo.
So the witch and her familiars
With unexpected flair
Whipped up the most amazing
And delicious party fare.
For entrée they prepared
Jellied eels in plastic tubs
And spiky handpicked spinifex
With crunchy witchetty grubs.
There was wattle macaroni
For the vegetarian crew
And tasty Kakadu plums
And native rock fig stew.
She made individual cream cakes
From Desert-Nardoo flour
And marinated, pan-fried ants
Arranged into a tower.
Sheila was delighted,
So they took a break for lunch.
‘We just need to put the tent up
And concoct the party punch!’
The marquee was erected.
Everything was almost set.
‘It’s party time for witch-folk
How could I forget?’
The bilby brought the cauldron
And into it they put,
A bunch of bush bananas
And an alligator foot.
Sheila slowly added nectar
From a honey corkwood flower
And a handful of acacia seed.
The brew was sweet and sour.
‘This punch is just delicious,’
She said sipping from a spoon.
‘Now I’d better get my cloak on
My guests will be here soon.’
‘A cloak?’ Big Red retorted.
‘Sheila! Where’s your cozzy?
Don’t tell me you forgot?
You have to come dressed as an Aussie?’
‘Fair dinkum! I’d forgotten!
It completely slipped my mind.
It shall have to be someone like me
Who’s beautiful and kind.
‘I think I’ll come as Kylie.
I’ll make something to wear.
We really are quite similar
If I do something with my hair.’
The witch pulled out a book of spells
‘I want sequins and some glitter.’
‘She’ll be lucky’ whispered Big-Red
‘If there’s a dress there that’ll fit her!
‘The cauldron’s being used now
So I’ll use this iron pail.’
And into it she cheerfully dropped
A bearded dragon’s tail.
Next she clipped her toe-nails
And dropped them all in too
And a handful of fresh droppings
From her friend, the kangaroo.
She closed her eyes to concentrate
But the spell was far too long.
She couldn’t quite remember it
And the words all came out wrong.
The wand that she was holding
Flew into the cane-toad trifle.
Alas! Her magic wand had turned
Into a plastic rifle.
She stamped her feet in fury
Tripping over Big-Red’s tail
And fell and got her head stuck
Inside the rusty pail.
The witch let out a mournful cry.
‘This party’s a disaster!
Help me get this bucket off.
Come on! Pull it faster!’
‘My guests will all be here soon
And everywhere ‘s a mess.
And I will be the only one
Who’s not in fancy-dress!’
But the bucket was stuck fast.
So she made a hole to see.
Just then they heard a phut-phut-bang!
Oh no! What could it be?
Hilda had come early
In her beaten-up old ute
She parked it in the garden
And gave the horn a toot.
‘How wonderful,’ her old friend said
(She was dressed as old Dame Nellie)
‘Whatever gave you that idea
To come dressed as Ned Kelly?’
Just then the clock struck seven
And the sky was thick with witches
In silly hats and fancy wigs
And different coloured britches.
Most of them came on broomsticks,
But others came on land.
Not all witches like to fly
As you may understand.
They all loved Sheila’s costume
She looked just like dear Ned.
‘It must have taken ages?’
‘Oh, it was nothing,’ Sheila said.
They all exclaimed they were impressed
With such a tasty spread.
And many of them wished they’d thought
To come dressed up as Ned.
So the witches partied all night long
They sang and danced and ate
And none of them suspected
She’d almost forgot’ the date.
Sheila and her familiars
Were the happiest they’d been
And wished their friends a very –
Happy Outback Halloween!
You can also read The Outback Witch Part One