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You Can Know Deck The Halls With Vulva Baubles!

You Can Know Deck The Halls With Vulva Baubles!

When I think of Christmas what normally comes to mind is mountains of festive food, kids ripping into their presents and lots of drunk relatives singing their rendition of Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas!

What doesn’t come to mind is a vagina. I’m sure if we were playing Family Feud it would NOT be one of the top 10 surveyed answers. There would be Turkey and Carols and Presents and Christmas Trees but I can guarantee you no-one would associate Christmas with a vagina.

Except for the creators of Feltmelons who have been making these impressive felt vulva (to use the correct term) baubles for a few years now.

The baubles come in a range of festive colours from the appropriately designed pink to hues of green and red also. They are all hand made with wool-blend felt and each feature a dangling bell in the place of a clitoris. Which kind of brings new meaning to ‘Ring My Bell’ don’t you think?

There are different sizes available, so you can choose a more subtle bauble or a statement vulva to decorate your tree.

The baubles come stuffed and embroided personally and even feature a folded up design to emulate the real thing. Feltmelons also recommends holding up the ornaments to your ear to ‘hear waves crashing on distant, rocky shores’, although we’re not sure why a vagina would evoke sounds of the sea? Regardless, these are definitely a talking point and would make a welcome addition to any family Christmas tree!

Do you know someone who would love these dangling on their tree?


Images: Etsy


Chrystal Lovevintage

Chrystal Lovevintage

Chrystal is a writer and blogger who loves nothing more than watching back to back episodes of crime shows. Should she ever find herself needing to cover up a crime, she'll know exactly what to do! Her dream is to one day live in Palm Springs where she can do her writing poolside while drinking endless gin and tonics. Mum to the cutest twin boys in the world, she loves nothing more than the sound of their laughter (usually heard when they're conspiring against her). Entertainment writer and pop culture junkie, she will be bringing you all the celebrity gossip and news that your brain can handle. You can follow her blog at and on Instagram at Chrystalovevintage

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