People Share the Best and Funniest Euphemisms for Telling Someone That They’re Stupid

Now, we all know that it is in everyone’s best interests to be kind to each other. That we should give each other all the respect and patience and compassion in the world, even if the person we’re talking to is sillier than a bum full of Smarties.

Maybe that’s why this hilarious list of euphemisms for telling someone that they are stupid is so great — they are too dumb to understand what they are being told!

People on Reddit were asked: ‘What’s the best euphemism for telling people that they’re stupid?’

Their answers were as clever as they were funny. Here are some of the best!

? ‘In Russian, we have “intelligent thoughts have always followed him, but he was faster”.’

? “You aren’t the biggest idiot in the world but you better hope they don’t die.”

? ‘I would agree with you but then we would both be wrong.’

? “At this point, you can only impress me.”

? ‘You’re the reason we have warning labels.’

? ‘In Greece, we say “when it was raining brains, you had an umbrella”

? ‘Once heard someone say “Well he’s about as sharp as a sock full of soup”

? ‘Ahh Terry, having you around is like losing three good men.’

? ‘He’s so far behind he thinks he’s first.’

? “You could fill a library the with things you don’t know, in fact, they do, they call them libraries”

? ‘In French, we sometimes say “he/she doesn’t have electricity on every floor”

? ‘The wheels spinning, but the hamster’s dead.’

? ‘You could blow in their ear and they would say thanks for the refill.’

? ‘It’s impossible to underestimate you.’

? “If you ever had a clever thought, it died alone and afraid.”

? ‘Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.’

? “They only got two brain cells and both of them are fighting for third place.”

? ‘A village somewhere is missing their idiot.’

? ‘My teacher said I was as “quick as a glacier”…’

? ‘You could hide your own Easter eggs.’

? ‘My days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.’

? ‘He has different talents.’

? ‘One of my all-time favourites is “More foam than beer”.’

? ‘Unencumbered by the thought process.’

? ‘If your brains were dynamite there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off.’

? “I’m guessing you weren’t burdened with an overabundance of schooling.”

? ‘Sharp as a marble, that one.’

? ‘Lmao I had a teacher that would always say ‘keep them guessing, don’t open your mouth and prove them right’

? “You got lost in thought and never made it back, didn’t you?”

? ‘I had a keychain as a kid that said, “She who laughs last thinks slowest”. ?’

? ‘Now I know what Douglas Adams was talking about. “A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.”

? ‘As the park rangers in Yellowstone say- making a bear-proof trash can is very difficult due to the considerable overlap between the smartest bears and the dumbest tourists.’

? ‘He is a modest man with much to be modest about.’ 

? ‘I can explain it again if you’d like, but I can’t understand for you.’

? ‘Your train of thought is a replacement bus service, isn’t it?’ 

? ‘you’re just spare parts, aren’t ya bud”

? “Are you a professional idiot, or just a gifted amateur?” 

? “They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge.”

? ‘Room temperature IQ.’ 

? ‘Couldn’t guess which way an elevator was going if they had 2 guesses.’

Source: Reddit