One clearly clueless man was recently surprised when his daughter was upset that he’d turned up to her wedding wearing a cream suit. The man, who’d become a young father at just 17-years-old, admits that he’s had a rather strained relationship with his daughter, but was elated when she asked him to walk her down the aisle.

I (39M), Recently went to my (22F) daughter’s wedding. Me and her have a strained relationship after her mother took her to another state after we broke up. I visited her every month, but unless i initiated it, the text and calls were dry.

When i got an invite to the wedding she told me i could walk her down the aisle, and i was elated that she would choose me, because her mom married and she grew up with him. (Me and mom’s husband talked on the phone and he told me its all good so we don’t have any problems )

Anyways i was not involved in any of the planning just walking her down the aisle and watching the wedding. So when choosing my outfit i went with a cream color as the theme was day at the beach. The cream color was to match a sandy vibe so thats what i went with.

When i walked i to the brides dressing room, i asked her how i look and she turn and let out a loud scream. She told me wearing that is gonna ruin her day(she was a huge bridezilla) she told me a day at the beach meant blue and yellow not cream because that was the color of her dress. Even though her dress resembled more white than cream.

She told me that i’m not gonna be able to walk her down the aisle but i said i can find something to change into but she said there is no time, so I left, and instead she got her Stepdad to walk her down.

When she found out i left she and her new husband blew up my phone saying i could have stayed and watched my only child’s wedding.

But i think if she didn’t want me to walk her down the aisle then she didn’t want me there.

If his aim was to garner support and come away feeling that his actions were justified , which no doubt it was, Mr Cream Suit would have been sorely disappointed. Commenters that most closely resembled being on his side thought that both he and his daughter sucked for their lack of communication and her overreaction.

ESH – Do you two even know how to communicate? Your daughter should have told you what to wear. You should have stayed and saw her wedding. (Commfortable-Focus123)

ESH. I’d expect a father and daughter to discuss what he was going to wear to walk her down the aisle, well in advance. And she was completely over the top, nobody was going to mistake you for her. (Kirstemis)

But even commenters that thought that his daughter shouldered some of the blame for the miscommunication, thought that he was an assehole for not staying to see her get married.

ESH.

Yes, she could have been clearer about what to wear. And she definitely handled it poorly.

But so did you. You just left without saying a word.

Also, of course you were the one to initiate contact. It’s called parenting. You see, as the parent in the relationship, it was on you to maintain the relationship. So, if you didn’t do that well, it’s no wonder your relationship is strained. (Disastrous-Nail-640)

ESH.

She should have communicated beyond ‘beach’ attire, not just ASSume you know that meant blue and yellow.

You actually LEFT the wedding?

Gosh, it’s a REAL MYSTERY why you have a strained relationship. (dart1126)

Not every agreed that his daughter was at fault and people did not hold back in the comments to tell him why. Many felt that his background information explained a lot about why his relationship was strained with his daughter in the first place.

YTA – I feel incredibly sorry for your daughter. Firstly “unless I initiated it the text and calls were dry” yeah bozo as her father it’s your responsibility to keep the relationship going not the child.

You could of asked her what would be appropriate, which would of avoided all this, calling your daughter brideziller is gross as well. Cream is exceptionally close to white.

And there was absolutely no reason for you to have left the wedding, sounds like your trying to punish her because you made a mistake.

You sound as immature as the day she was born, grow up and be a good father. (pringellover9553)

Her over-the-top reaction, along with his absence in her life, makes me feel like this wasn’t just about what he was wearing. Isolated, this seems like something dumb for her to be mad about but in her mind, this was just the latest of dad’s failures to do the right thing.

He was 17 when she was born, and while he should have done better when he became an adult, he was still young. I’m not going to blame him for his failures as a parent, but the fact that he was a failure as a parent means I’m not going to blame his daughter for her reaction either.

Sometimes it’s not just about the colour of the outfit. (kljbh)

Other people agreed that his daughter was probably reacting to feeling let down by him again, on a day that was special to her.

What upsets me is this guy sounds like he didn’t really try to be a father, never really engaged with his daughter, and was completely disinterested in the lead up to the wedding. Wearing inappropriate attire is just a physical manifestation of years of letting his daughter down.

I took the yellow and blue comment as “beachy colors like yellow and blue”, not that this was the dress code. I’ve been to many beach weddings and live near the beach – blue blazers of all shades are pretty standard. Cream is absolutely not. (mazel-tov-cocktail)

The majority of people felt that his propensity to make things about himself rather than actually stepping up and being a good dad was the main issue.

You are the biggest fucking baby. “Unless I initiated it” “she was a huge bridezilla” “if she didn’t want me to walk her down the aisle she didn’t want me there .” So, to you, your lack of relationship with your child when she was a child is her fault, you were involved in zero planning but felt right to label her a bridezilla, and you pitched a fit like a baby and left your daughter’s wedding instead of fulfilling one of two of your required roles of the day and “watching the wedding.” There’s no way a “bridezilla” would have forgotten to tell you what colors to wear since you were part of the wedding with a dress code and you couldn’t tell based off invitations, what you were told other people would be wearing, or literally anything else. You don’t live under a rock when your daughter is getting married unless you put yourself there on purpose so you can ruin her day and get back at her for daring to have another father figure in her life. This screams feighned incompetence and jealous petty bullshit from a lonely loser. YTA. It’s not the color of your suit. It’s your fucking attitude. (Psychological-Pea-42)

You LEFT? You left and did not see your daughter’s wedding because a bride was stressed and overreacting? So you decided to overreact MORE? Also, did you have a cream suit made?!

YTA my dude. (ChickenCasagrande)

YTA for your general attitude. Sounds like you resent your child for not calling enough when she was growing up. Newsflash buddy, the onus is on the parent… you know, the adult (angie1907)

What do you think? Did his daughter overreact? Are they both to blame for the misunderstanding or did she learn her communication style from her father?