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People Share the Worst Baby Names They’ve Heard That Parents Think Sound Classy But Don’t!

Choosing your child’s name is a huge responsibility. Most of us deliberate over it for months, making sure it doesn’t rhyme with anything unfortunate and that the initials don’t spell out something rude or embarrassing. Whilst whether a name sounds nice to you or not is subjective, there are some names that are almost universal thought of as awful. Some parents choose names that they think sound classy, but it ends up having the opposite effect.

Here’s some of the worst offenders:

Know a guy who named his kid Bourbon. “It’s an old French name.” Because that’s what everyone will think when they hear it. (JKW1988)


Knew a girl named Bourbondy 🙄😂 (mashable88)


Chardonnay. (MelmanCourt)


Hennessy (high5scubadive)


I had a pair of twin boys in one of my classes named Master and Sir. (albuqwirkymom)


I went to school with cousins named Madam and Sir (rodgersp17)


Old coworker named their kid “Dolce Gabbana [lastname]”… yeah they were kinda trashy. (nelsonalgrencametome)


When I was a kid I lived next door to 3 little girls I played with all the time, Chanel, Tiffany, and Gucci. (Lena7x)


Michael Jackson’s brother, Jermaine, named one of his children Jermajesty. That one always makes me laugh. (percybert)


I met a girl named Lasagna. I asked her to repeat her name about 10 times and this is what she kept saying. Later on, I figured out it was La Sonya. But she totally said it like the food. (goldenhourcocktails)


I work in l&d- (labour and delivery) I’ve heard some names for sure. We actually keep a list at the nurses station. Among those names, we have;




Cartier (as in the designer)


Turquoise Diamond

King James

Many more, but these are the ones I can recall off the top of my head. (phriend75)


I maintain that one of the trashiest things you can do is make your kid after some sort of luxury brand. Real people with money don’t do that. (katnerys)


I had a neighbour kid called Armani….. seriously it was funny anytime his mom yelled at him it sounded like she was dramatically searching for a bag or something it was hilarious! (OliveaSea)


I knew a Pashyion, pronounced ‘passion’ (SoonToBeStardust)


Destiny, Princess, Precious, Heaven, Diamond. All real names of real people. Sad. They all sound like stripper names to me. (Anonymousnecropolis)


My boss at the video store I worked at right after Episode I came out named his kid Annakin. (uggghhhggghhh)


Babies named after U.S. States or luxury vehicles. Like Montana or Porsche. (BatteringRams90)


Naming after a city, like Paris or Dallas (Human_Dog_195)


I had a student named Tequila. Needless to say, she was a handful. (daisychain82)


Names that sound like a my little pony. Trueheart was one of my daughter’s classmates. (BiteyMadLady12)


Had a customer who named her twin sons Legend & Legendary 🙄 (low_Conversation_417)


Faux spiritual try hard names that just sound like the person is desperate to give their baby a “unique” name like Neveah, River, Amethyst, King. (De_la_Dead)


Worked at a daycare and took care of two kids named Champagne and Caviar. (Worth_Ability_3808)


When I worked in GP I met 4 young girls called Renesmee with various spellings. It was ridiculous in the book and it’s even worse in real life and basically broadcasts “your mum likes Twilight” which is not something to be proud of (RCT93)


I know this rich couple who named their kids Prada and Gucci. They are oblivious that most people think they are dumb as fuck for choosing those names. (HiccupsHives)


My cousins went to school with Candida. This was the 80s/90s (csj77)

What’s the worst trying-to-be-classy-but-failing name you’ve ever heard?

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Jolene enjoys writing, sharing and connecting with other like-minded women online – it also gives her the perfect excuse to ignore Mount-Washmore until it threatens to bury her family in an avalanche of Skylander T-shirts and Frozen Pyjama pants. (No one ever knows where the matching top is!) Likes: Reading, cooking, sketching, dancing (preferably with a Sav Blanc in one hand), social media, and sitting down on a toilet seat that one of her children hasn’t dripped, splashed or sprayed on. Dislikes: Writing pretentious crap about herself in online bio’s and refereeing arguments amongst her offspring.

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