If These Hilarious Reviews Don’t Convince You That You Need a 🍒 Massager in Your Life, Nothing Will!

Don’t you just love it when you’re researching a product and stumble upon a treasure trove of hilarious reviews. Not only do you end up adding it to your cart (for research purposes of course!), you also lose the best part of an hour scrolling through the comments and giggling like a schoolgirl!

So with that in mind, let me introduce you to the Womanizer Starlet Clitoral Stimulator and the stir it’s been causing both online, and in the nether regions of the ladies lucky enough to own one!

Oh my god

Oh my. First of all WOW. WOW. I’ve only tried it on the first setting and my Fitbit freaked out because it thought I was having a heart attack. If I had been, I’d have died happy. Expected delivery due 13th may. Product came much quicker than expected. As did I. The end.

Bottom Line: Amazing purchase.

Pros: Everything.

Cons: Nothing.

Holy Moly….wow!!!

Well…to look at, this toy resembles one of those things you see on telly for sucking blackheads in to submission…don’t be put off…this WILL NOT SUCK YOUR LOVE-BUTTON FROM YOUR BODY! What it does do…oh my god does it….
So picture the scene. It’s 9pm, the lights are low, there’s the gentle sounds of Heart 80s playing in the background. You and your lover settled in for a long night of pleasures of the flesh… After kissing you from head to toe and all the other tender things he or she does to you to get your juices flowing; They reach for this weird but intriguing play thing and guide it to your lady garden. It’s now 9.20pm and after a few moments of the higher/lower game (no not play your cards right) they manoeuvre this mystical gadget right on to the optimum part of your butter bean. What Sourcery is this!!! That 3 hour mutual love session you were expecting suddenly becomes an uncontrollable orgasm marathon and your partner shrieking “ah you squirted in my eye”.
Seriously the best toy I’ve ever had the pleasure of drowning!
5 stars…10/10…every girl needs one!
However, I can confirm it did not work on hubby’s love sausage. Oh well…what a shame (NOT).
Seriously though…GET ONE!!

I had been reading about clitoral suction sex toys for a while and really wanted to try one out. When this one went on sale I knew I had to buy it. I can honestly say it’s the best sex toy I own in terms of orgasm potential. I know each and every-time I use it I’ll orgasm within minutes and believe me I’ve tested it more than enough to come to that conclusion. The first time I tried it I was so excited and it did not disappoint. After I’d finished I lay on the bed and started giggling to myself because it was such a joy. I also didn’t think my legs were going to work because of how powerful my orgasm had been. If you are contemplating getting one it is without a doubt worth the investment. I’ve told all my friends they HAVE to go and get one as soon as possible, the last year has been tough we deserve to treat ourselves! Read lessRead less about review stating Wow

Cons: Buttons can be difficult to work when you’re “in the moment”.

Pros: Powerful intense orgasms.

Bottom Line: You have to buy it, you deserve it!

Holy fuck, I’ll die alone,

Holy fuck, I’ll die alone, I don’t even care anymore! This thing is amazing! Its also super quick if I want it to be, so I can get off super quick before work, and have long solo sessions. I used it in conjunction with a vibrator and came so hard I threw my back out.

Bottom Line: Life changing

Tried in the shower for the first time and i ended up folded like a deck chair it was that good!! AND all in 5minutes too. Most efficient O ever

Pros:Really is handsized. Simple to use and to clean

Cons:Nothing.

Bottom Line:10/10 get it girl.

Holy heck

If you don’t buy one right now you are crazy. An orgasm within minutes. I’m actually addicted – could possibly be a problem. I’ve gotten all my friends onto it.

Pros: Um everything

Cons: Nothing!!

Bottom Line:A million/10

Restored my faith, amazing

Up until I got this, I’d tried a handful of toys and nothing ever made me finish. I was kind of down about it and so when I stumbled upon this toy, I thought I’d give it a go. I went halves with my partner on it as he’s away for work and knew I needed something to keep me occupied in the meantime. I was not disappointed…. The first time I used this, coupled with a decent helping of lube, I was in for a massive shock… because honestly it nearly made me finish in 30 seconds! I slowed down the speed before I did myself an injury and it was amazing. I reported back to my partner with a massive grin on my face and my faith in orgasms restored. It’s worth every penny.

Bottom Line: An absolute godsend.

Cons: Nothing.

Pros: The power, the sensation, plenty of warning before it runs out of charge.

Don’t hesitate, just buy this

I was skeptical at first but decided to take the plunge because of the viral reviews. The first day I had it, I came 5 times in about 30 minutes. I have used it everyday since it arrived. I absolutely love this thing. I made the mistake of cranking it up to the third setting because it wasn’t positioned correctly. Whenever it was in the right place.. OH MY GOD. I felt my soul leave my body and I was shaking afterwards. Bottom line: BUY THIS TOY.  Don’t hesitate, just buy this

Pros: Everything.

Cons:Nothing.

Bottom Line: The best toy ever.

Oh my god

Oh my. First of all WOW. WOW. I’ve only tried it on the first setting and my Fitbit freaked out because it thought I was having a heart attack. If I had been, I’d have died happy. Expected delivery due 13th may. Product came much quicker than expected. As did I. The end.

Bottom Line: Amazing purchase.

Pros: Everything.

Cons:Nothing.

Seeing Stars

I have only ever orgasmed from my own talented talons so didn’t hold out much hope. I was so wrong – I orgasmed in less than a minute with this and it didn’t stop at one!! Truly worth the money

HOLY F*** BALLS

Is what I would have said if I could muster up any sort of ability to speak after the earth shattering experience I just had.
I opened up the usual discreet packaging, instantly noticing how light it felt, to find this dainty little box, so sleek and professional almost as if I’ve just bought the latest iPhone accessory from Steve Jobs himself.
Eagerly opening up the box I found the star of the show, along with a mini cable for charging and some helpful instructions on how to part your lady lips and place it perfectly onto the pleasure button. All pretty straight forward so far, I popped the womanizer, as it’s so aptly named on charge, further reading that for best results you should let it fully juice up for 3 hours. With it already being past my bed time (21:00) I reluctantly left it to charge over night, thinking only of the benefit future me will get from a vibrating machine with a full battery.
Like a kid on Christmas morning I woke up a little giddy as I remember about my new little friend sat there, now fully charged with a solid pink light. I quickly grab it and give the tip a wash to get rid of those new plastic particles. Sliding back into bed I prepare myself just for a moment to get into the mood. I then place the little guy securely and gently onto its designated area. Holding down the on button for a few seconds, and the games begin.
The first setting is gentle as described however, get it just into the right spot and it’s like you’re being teased, maybe woken up by a lovers tongue on a lazy Sunday morning. Eager to up the anti though I press the button again and boy does this change things, a little bit of adjusting here and there, I soon find the perfect spot, so perfect that I already have to stop myself from finishing when the party has only just begun!
Finally when I could take it no longer I took it up another notch. I barely got chance to decide what I thought of it before I hit the big O. The usual euphoric sensation I would experience from the rest of my vibration collection and then some! Muscles contracting uncontrollably, my hand shaking, barely able to hold onto the gadget that’s causing these erratic movements of euphoria.
I soon had to remove my hand and turn the pleasure maker off in order to catch my breath. But sure enough I was going in for round two, I hadn’t even got to the main event, setting number four.
I repositioned myself and this magical little thing and began again, going up through the ranks a little quicker but then remaining on step three until I knew I was close. Moment of truth I pressed the button for the fourth and final time…
Well…
I wasn’t sure when my second orgasm ended and the third, fourth, maybe even fifth began. Staring up at the ceiling as wave after wave of pleasure coursed through every part of me. I’m 99% certain I saw god but the jury’s still out on that one.
Once I had returned from this out of body experience I lay there for a while contemplating what just happened, the muscles in my legs and bum still twitching from pleasure, or just lack of oxygen.
Looking at the device afterward as I write this review still baffled as to how so much power and pleaser can come (quite literally) in such a small travel sized package

Get the Womaniser Starlet Clitoral Suction Vibe 10% off now until the 30th November 2023 at Lovehoney. Use code AFF-ML10 at the checkout! 

Related article: The Toy That Women are Worshipping for Giving Them a Blended Orgasm!

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