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Arsenic Hour: Tatum Therapy



Arsenic Hour: Tatum Therapy

Last Saturday Hubbster and I enjoyed the rare treat of having a meal together without the kids.

It wasn’t anything flash, just a meal at our local pub, but it tasted all the better for not having to cook it, or wash up after it.  It was also nice to get out of the four walls and have Hubby to myself, albeit in a room full of other people.

Things were going fabulously until we overheard our neighbour announce to the table full of people he was sitting with that he was ‘going commando.’

When I say overheard, what I really mean of course is that he had been at the football all afternoon and had a few beers under his belt, and is volume control was a little faulty.  In truth, the whole restaurant ‘overheard’ his announcement.

Now, my problem is this.

I cannot now see that man without vivid (and not exactly pleasant) images popping into my mind of his candle blowing in the wind (so to speak).

So…to combat this I have been subjecting myself to an intense course of what I like to refer to as Tatum Therapy.

It is very simple.

It involves clearing your mind of all negative thoughts…

And then focusing all your energy…

On this…


And this…



Trust me!  Even in his grandad’s ugly old underwear Tatum Channing makes all the bad thoughts go away!

For the advanced there are also the visualization techniques, involving the dancing around the Tatum Totem Pole…But let’s not go there, eh?

So, what do you think?  Will you be enrolling in my Tatum Therapy sessions?  Or are you too cool to drool?



Jolene enjoys writing, sharing and connecting with other like-minded women online – it also gives her the perfect excuse to ignore Mount-Washmore until it threatens to bury her family in an avalanche of Skylander T-shirts and Frozen Pyjama pants. (No one ever knows where the matching top is!) Likes: Reading, cooking, sketching, dancing (preferably with a Sav Blanc in one hand), social media, and sitting down on a toilet seat that one of her children hasn’t dripped, splashed or sprayed on. Dislikes: Writing pretentious crap about herself in online bio’s and refereeing arguments amongst her offspring.

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