“My Wife Tried to Take the Credit in Front of Our Friends for a Birthday Gift I Bought for Myself with My Kids”
If there is one thing that you learn from scrolling the internet for even a short period, it’s that people can be very strange, and complicated…but mostly strange! One man has taken to Reddit to find out if he is in the wrong after his recent birthday party took a strange turn. In a brief background explanation, he reveals that he loves Lego – a hobby that his wife is embarrassed about and does not encourage. So, for his birthday he took his kids to the toy shop to help him pick out a new Lego set. However, at his birthday party, noticing all of their guests admiring the Lego set, she tried to tell people that she in fact bought it for him.
We just had people over to the house for my 45th birthday.
I managed to make it into my thirties without getting married then I met my wife (29). She is perfect for me. She is the most beautiful woman I have ever met and she is so much smarter than me it is embarrassing sometimes.
She is amazing but she has one weird hang-up. She thinks some of my hobbies are immature. Which is fine. She can be the mature one in our relationship.
We have two kids 7/5. Never thought I wanted kids but now know I couldn’t live without them. They wanted to get me a present for my big birthday. So we went to ToysRUs and got me a sweet Lego set. Then I helped them wrap it up so I could open it up at our party.
All the guys were jealous of my new Lego set. I got some nice golf stuff and some very nice bourbon but all the guys could talk about was my new Millennium Falcon.
My wife for some reason decided to take the credit from the kids. She was telling everyone how she got it for me because I’m such a little boy at heart. Our kids heard her and were confused because they know she wasn’t involved at all. They were telling everyone how they took me to the store to find something I would love. The each even put in some of their own money ($10 each) to buy my gift.
When guys asked me about it I told the truth that my kids and I had bought it and that my gift from my wife was new golf clubs.
She is upset that the gift she got me wasn’t the one everyone thought was the best. She said I should have made it shift from the family and not just the kids.
I told her that her gift was amazing and that I will be using them for years and that I appreciate her getting me something that useful. But I said that the kids had chosen to get me a toy and that she shouldn’t try and take credit.
She says that I didn’t have to exclude her from the toy shopping. And that I didn’t need to tell people she wasn’t involved in buying me my “toy”. I didn’t. She has told me in the past that it embarrasses her that I play with toys.
Commenters pointed out that the wife seemed to care far too much about what other people thought of her, and that her actions were very immature and self absorbed.
She’s not jealous of the kids or being included, she’s jealous that other adults think OPs hobbies are interesting and she wants the credit for them.
She doesn’t care what OP or the kids think but she deeply cares about other adults’ opinions. It’s why she shuns OP’s “immature” hobbies, because she thinks people will judge her for them. (MonkeyPawWishes)
NTA
It’s honestly so weird that she lied and took credit for something she knew she wasn’t involved in at all. Why would she take credit from the kids? Her gift doesn’t need to be the best one and she is acting super immature here. But then again she is only 29 and you’re 45, which is a huge age gap and most people don’t need to run around a birthday party and lie about a gift from their own kids when they are in their 30s/40s (typically) (crimsonraiden)
NTA. You did nothing wrong. Although for someone who you called smarter than you, your wife’s action doesn’t scream smart. (RoseCamellia)
NTA. I’m confused who your wife thinks she’s fooling/impressing. Trying to steal “credit” from her kids is a low blow and super embarrassing, but she embarrassed herself all on her own, and you did no wrong standing up for your kids. (salty_bae)
Not only did she lie in front of the children, she expected them and her husband to go along with the lie! Anyone who knows young children know that stopping them for blurting out the truth was inevitable, and besides, what sort of life lesson is that for them?
NTA but man, your wife tried to steal the thunder right out from under your kids. That’s just shameful. She didnt think the kids, who are old enough to understand, wouldn’t speak up. HAHAH that’s laughable.
Also, what an awesome birthday gift Millennium Falcon 7541 pieces. We just got the Titanic 9090 pieces. So much fun to build, not a clue where to put it though. (Liquidsky72)
NTA.
It’s not your responsibility to support your wife’s lie. Apparently her pride and need for attention is more important than the need to support her own kids and demonstrate honesty to them. (revo63)
Some commenters thought that it was concerning that she was trying to steal the limelight on an occasion that wasn’t about her, and that it said a lot about her character.
So your wife is jealous that she wasn’t centre stage at your birthday? Does she always have to get all the attention all the time? It’s really unhealthy to be hogging the spotlight, especially from your kids. NTA (DubiousPeoplePleaser)
She sounds like the horrendous coworker that takes credit for everything. The type where you come up with idea then suddenly it was “her idea” or “our idea” and not your original work/idea. Your kids are watching and learning this behavior. Don’t let them grow up to be that coworker who takes the credit away from others. (Successful-Juice9719)
One single solitary commenter suggested a possible reason for the wife’s behaviour.
The Lego Millennium Falcon costs about £700 / $850 usd. That’s a very expensive present he essentially bought for himself. His wife could well just be embarrassed at anyone thinking the purchase of such a costly toy was anything other than a ‘joint’ decision. Maybe she hasn’t even realised it herself but I don’t think her claiming ‘credit’ was to increase her own standing – it’s to protect how they look as a unit.
If my kids saw one of us spend that much on Lego for ourselves it would certainly have some bearing on what they or we felt we should be getting them on their next big day. Speaking of which, since when is 45 a major birthday?!! (MmmmHollandaise)
What do you think? Did the man embarrass his wife by telling his guests the truth about who bought the gift, or did she do that all by herself?