Written by Danielle Phillips, Owner and Founder of Sage Executor Solutions

I never imagined that the most defining chapter of my life would begin with the loss of my parents. Grief is never easy, but navigating it while shouldering the immense responsibility of estate administration, twice, is something I wish on no one.

My dad passed away suddenly during the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic. He was interstate, and due to border closures, quarantine and hospital restrictions, I wasn’t able to say goodbye. That absence haunts me still. The helplessness of not being able to hold his hand or whisper final words will stay etched in my soul forever.

In the midst of my own heartbreak, I had to immediately step up to care for my mum, who had a very rare neurological disease called Corticobasal Degeneration. For 3 months after Dad died I became her full-time carer, emotionally, physically, logistically.

Upon the borders being reopened into South Australia, I swiftly booked the first flights available and relocated Mum from interstate into full time residential aged care in South Australia where I could visit and take her out every day.

Related article: Tips for Helping Kids Through Grief

Sadly, Mum passed away not long after. The heartbreak compounded in a way I can’t describe. I was only 35 and had lost both of my anchors

But I didn’t have time to grieve.

Instead of finding a space to breathe, to fall apart, or to seek grief counselling, I was immediately pulled into the complex and relentless world of estate administration. I was the executor of not one, but two estates. I quickly found myself drowning in paperwork, legal jargon, deadlines, and unfamiliar responsibilities, all while still gasping for air from the weight of my loss.

Being an executor isn’t just about honouring someone’s wishes. It’s a role that demands your time, your mental energy, and your capacity, often when you have none to give.

Every day for over 12 months, I had to repeat my parents’ names and their dates of death, on forms, in phone calls, in emails, to banks, government agencies, super funds, utilities, Medicare, share registries and more. I had to sit in Centrelink offices with death certificates in my bag. I had to explain, again and again, that they were no longer here.

Imagine reliving your greatest heartbreak daily, in the most clinical and administrative way possible.

Over that year, I finalised both estates. It was a mammoth task. There are over 40 different administrative processes that can arise after someone dies, and I had to learn them the hard way, in real time, while my heart was still in pieces. I didn’t even have the capacity to seek help for my grief. All of my emotional bandwidth was spent just getting through the legalities.

It was only after I emerged from that fog that I realised how unsupported most Australians are when a loved one dies. Executors are thrown into a role that no one truly prepares for. And I began to hear the same thing from others: “I don’t know where to start,” or “I can’t think straight,” or “Why didn’t anyone tell me this would happen?”

That’s when Sage Executor Solutions was born.

I didn’t want others to suffer the way I did, not just through grief, but through the silent burnout of trying to manage an estate without guidance, clarity, or emotional support. So I created a service that would have been a lifeline to me during those 12 months.

At Sage Executor Solutions, I now offer three core services:

1. After Death Administration Support

This is for those who have been named executor and are overwhelmed from day one. I help mobilise them into their role and then coordinate and manage the 40+ administrative tasks required over the coming months. This includes things like notifying institutions, managing shareholdings, handling superannuation, and understanding tax implications.

I also connect clients with a trusted network of probate lawyers, conveyancers, and other professionals, so they don’t have to go hunting for help during such a vulnerable time. I become their project manager, their thinking partner, and, in many ways, their emotional anchor.

2. Pre-Planning for After Death Administration Consultation & Executor DIY Manual

One of the most powerful ways to reduce the executor’s burden is to prepare while you’re still alive. My pre-planning consultation helps individuals and families understand the true scope of what’s involved in administering a deceased estate, which goes far beyond just “reading the Will.”

From there, I can create a DIY Executor’s Manual, personalised to their unique circumstances. This manual has been described by clients as “a godsend,” cutting their workload in half and giving executors a roadmap they didn’t know they needed.

3. The Executor Masterclass

For those who want to understand the process in depth, I offer a self-paced online masterclass. It’s everything you need to know about becoming an executor: the steps, the legalities, the pitfalls, the timelines, the documents, and how to emotionally pace yourself through it.

It’s the course I wish someone had handed me the day after Dad passed.

I’ve come to realise that being an executor is one of the most unrecognised roles a person will ever step into. It is administrative, yes, but it is also deeply emotional. You are closing a chapter of someone’s life while trying to continue your own. You are processing paperwork while pushing down waves of grief. You are handling property transfers while wondering how your parent’s voice has faded so quickly from your memory.

No one tells you that. Until it’s you.

Through Sage Executor Solutions, I get to hold space for people in that strange dual reality. I get to give them a structure to work within, a plan to follow, and the validation that what they’re feeling is completely normal.

More importantly, I get to ensure they don’t walk through it alone.

To all the mums, daughters, partners, and families out there who’ve found themselves suddenly “in charge” after a death, I see you. If you’re quietly suffering while filling out forms, if you’re overwhelmed by decisions while everyone else is moving on, please know there is help. There is a gentler way to do this.

My parents gave me so much in life, but perhaps the most unexpected gift was the calling that came after their deaths, to transform grief into guidance for others.

And for that, I am forever grateful.