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20 Hilarious ‘Things I Believed as a Kid’

things i believed as a kid

When you are a child, learning about the world, and the finer points of the English language, it’s easy to  misunderstand, or come to the wrong (and in hindsight, quite hilarious) conclusions.  I’d bet there a few of us who didn’t at some point think that the moon or the sun was following us – y’know, only us – ‘cos we were kind of a big deal!  Right?

Check out my top 20 hilarious ‘things I believed as a child’ as found on Reddit.
  1. As a kid, I thought people quit smoking by eating slices of cold turkey.


  1. As a kid I thought when music faded out, the musicians were slowly walking backwards away from their microphones.


  1. As a kid I believed that when you turned off a VHS tape the characters of the movie would just hang out and wait for you to watch the tape again.


things i believed as a child
Try no tot drop them. You might hurt the miniature little actor people living inside!
  1. As a kid, I got very upset when I didn’t see the Care Bears living above the clouds on my first plane ride.


  1. As a kid, I thought I was feeding fish in the ocean by putting food down the sink.


  1. As a kid, I thought the world was in black and white, and it suddenly came into color one day, and that’s why we have black and white pictures along with color pictures.


  1. As a kid, I believed that banks had a safe for each of their clients to physically store all their money in, and that money withdrawn from ATMs traveled directly from your safe via tubes.


  1. As a kid I thought the number on the shoes represent the speed of the shoes, and not the size.


things I believed as a child
Clowns…the fastest of all land mammals!
  1. When I was a kid, I thought that the huge, billowing pillars of steam from the local steel mills were clouds, and that the mills were actually cloud factories.


  1. As a kid, I believed that teachers just lived at school.


  1. As a kid, I believed that I could hum loud enough to make everything around me shake, but I was just making my eyes vibrate a little.


  1. As a kid, I believed that the fax machine actually transported your document to its destination.


  1. As a kid, when people talked about skyscrapers, I thought they were talking about F-16 jets because when they flew by I thought the planes were scraping the sky.


Check out those skyscrapers…you know…scraping the sky and stuff!
  1. As a kid, I thought there must have been some kind of tiny camera built into child-proof caps that could tell whether it was a kid or a grown up that was opening it.


  1. As a kid I used to think “in a few years I will be older than my big brother, then I will beat him up.”


  1. As a kid, I thought that a fire drill was literally a drill that shot fire


  1. As a kid, I thought when you went inside an elevator, people changed the floor really quickly for you and then you saw different things on the same floor.


  1. As a kid I believed thunder was angels spilling their wheelbarrows of potatoes.


  1. As a kid, when I lost one of my action figures I thought that he had come to life and wandered off.


  1. As a kid I thought “prosecute” and “execute” were the same thing, and that Woolworths would kill shoplifters.



How many of them can you relate to?  What is the funniest thing you believed as a child?



Jolene enjoys writing, sharing and connecting with other like-minded women online – it also gives her the perfect excuse to ignore Mount-Washmore until it threatens to bury her family in an avalanche of Skylander T-shirts and Frozen Pyjama pants. (No one ever knows where the matching top is!) Likes: Reading, cooking, sketching, dancing (preferably with a Sav Blanc in one hand), social media, and sitting down on a toilet seat that one of her children hasn’t dripped, splashed or sprayed on. Dislikes: Writing pretentious crap about herself in online bio’s and refereeing arguments amongst her offspring.

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