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FFS: I Do Not Want to Wear a Vagina Around My Neck

FFS: I Do Not Want to Wear a Vagina Around My Neck

I have a pretty liberal sense of humour when it comes to genitals. For example, this is the cake I made for my daughter when she graduated university (she is a midwife, that’s probably an important point to add).

And, this little beauty hangs in our bar (bottle opener in case it’s not immediately clear):


But I absolutely, one thousand per cent draw the line at wearing a vagina, as a piece of art, around my neck!!!!!!!


These necklaces (complete with a clitoris crystal) are available for sale on Emily Mystical’s Etsy store but don’t rush out to buy one just yet because wait for it…demand is SO HIGH she has temporarily had to close down.

Emily started the creations last year – check out her Instagram feed here.  One follower wrote: “Sorry, I’m not making fun of you, but looks like a vagina? Maybe fix up, or not.” She responded with: “It is a vagina”.

The vaginas come complete with seeing eyes. Well, of course they do. Thankfully they are not Scratch ‘n Sniff.

Is this empowerment or absolutely ridiculous? I’m in the latter category but given the thousands of likes she’s received for her creations and the back-order I guess I’m not in the majority.

Will their be competitions for the most glittery? My vagina is prettier than yours?

What’s next? Dicks on a chain for men? That would NEVER work because they would all want one 3 feet long weighing 2 kilos because hey, mine’s bigger than yours.


What do you think? Would you wear one?



Carolyn Murphy

Carolyn Murphy

Carolyn Murphy is a married mother of three and regularly provides us with recipes and strange but true stories about her life. When she’s not here, she can also be found on her website where all her other recipes are located!

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